At Christmas, the Gift of Family
“People can be so cold, never want to turn your back
Just giving to get something
Always wanting something back
When I get lonely and need to be
Loved for who I am, not what they want to see
Brothers and Sisters they have always been there for me
We have a connection; home is where the heart should be”
- Madonna “Keep it Together”
Family TiesThis holiday season, I wanted to talk about the gratitude I have for my own parents. As I am getting older, I am realizing that the love and support I have gotten from my parents all these years has been taken for granted on my part. The usual life-cycle goes from friendships to partnership to creating life on your own or creating your own family.
we often hear about the cultural divide between South Asian parents and their first generation children, about the pain that is associated with the cultural conflict. Whenever I interact with young South Asians they often tell long sob stories about their parents, about the fights and the expectations. Yes, they want to live a modern life here in America-without an arranged marriage and a free will to live and let live. Which works out because the life they have is different than the life their parents had.
However, no one gives credit where credit is due, to their very own parents. Many supportive desi parents raised their children to be polite, respectful, accepting and to follow their heart and dreams. They instilled the values of hard work and perseverance and always taught their children right from wrong.
So in this blog I want to talk about how blessed I am to have the family that I have.
To My Mom:
Dear Mom, your endless amount of support has given me courage to face the world. You have laughed with me, cried with me and endured trials and tribulations with me. You have taught me to walk in faith and believe in positive things. No one in my life could ever replace you or your place in my heart. Our endless chats throughout the day are just not enough and you live and breathe inside me.
To My Dad:
Thanks for teaching me the importance of going on, even when I just didn’t feel like it. You have taught me that hard work can really make a difference. I don’t take anything that I have worked for granted because I watched two hard-working parents really make it in this world. You were so right, retirement funds and health insurance are so important. I am the self-reliant, independent person because of you and mom.
To My Brother:
You saved my life. I wouldn’t have gotten half the brilliant experiences had it not been for you. Taking a donkey up a mountain in Greece, a luau in Hawaii, a camel ride in India (to name a few). Thanks so much for the good times!
Those of you that were lucky enough to be born into a family that really taught you the importance of survival and decency are truly blessed. Don’t look for something else. There isn’t anything else. You are so lucky if you have your family to talk to. Most of my life I took it for granted. But I am not going to do that anymore.
For those who don’t have a supportive family, I feel for you. My empathy knows no bounds. I am nothing without my family. That is why I am going to ask each and every one of my readers that if you see someone who doesn’t have a supportive family or very many friends and is alone and lonely – if you could invite them over for some holiday cheer. The holidays can be a rough time for the lonely and all they need is a loving hand, someone to guide them through it. Show them the meaning of kindness, so they can experience what you are lucky enough to experience all of the time.
Remember, your family is your home!
(Monica Marwah is a 30-something single school psychologist who enjoys living life to the fullest. She is taking her experience and showing others how to believe in themselves and love themselves completely. After years of dating and meeting people, she has come into her own. Spirituality has been a foundation for self improvement for her and she is hoping to encourage people to embark upon a spiritual journey at this age.)