Browsing: desi relationships

“If you’re a (born again) single woman, and traveling in India, be prepared to be judged. You walk in, you are single, you will be singled out.
Do not let slip you were once married. Divorcee spells danger. You cannot talk to any man assembled there, without prejudice.

By the time you have settled down with a drink thrust into your hand, womenfolk in the room have automatically assumed you are there with the sole purpose of playing “Le Slut”, out to ensnare the nearest male with your beguiling ways and doe-eyed charm…and married Indian women can be spiteful.” Guest Blog by Tori Roy.

To have children or not – that is the question. Some people can’t wait to have children. They have wanted children since their high school graduation; some people want to live life, see where they go and experience their own selves before committing to someone else; some people want to get an education, get multiple degrees, work different jobs and establish their independence; some people want to have a single life, no strings attached, do whatever, whenever. Lifestyles are a choice and one should be free to live how they want to live in life.
Guest Blog – The Single Desi

“Do you take responsibility for the emotional pain that others have inflicted on you? Do you feel excessively bad? Do you blame yourself for not being good enough to please this person? Do you walk away? Do you not care?

Some of us take life very seriously; some of us don’t take life seriously enough. Some of us are in between. No matter what category you fall into, you can be damaged by other people’s emotional outbursts or nasty actions. As a psychologist, I cannot stress enough the importance of moving on and letting go.”
Guest Blog: The Single Desi. Photo: Harpreet Thinking

“When I was growing up, there was no Internet. We didn’t have access to people’s personal lives the way we do now. Things were happening back then but no one except immediate family and friends knew about it until some reporter got wind of it.

Now there are countless blogs, online magazines, social media, socialites and reality stars floating around. News flies around the world with the click of a button within two seconds. It is in your face and you can’t just ignore it.

However, I feel that there is a reason everyone is obsessed with celebrity culture and personal lives of celebrities: we are trying to find someone to relate to. Someone to look up to; Someone who is having experiences that parallel our experiences; Someone who can let us know that there is nothing wrong with us when bad things happen to us.” Guest Blog – Sex & the Single Desi
Photo: Christina Aguilera by Balt-art.

“Over the years, I have learned to be more protective and loving towards myself, therefore making excuses for other people’s blatant disrespect is something I am not willing to spend my life doing.

Sometimes, when you are around someone who is being uncharacteristically rude or nasty and walking away is leaving you with unanswered questions, then posing the question “Why are you so mean?” can help get a person to understand that it isn’t acceptable to behave this way around people, regardless of whether he likes you or not.”

Guest Blog – Sex and the Single Desi

“One of my friends in the States is a head turner. Not only is she unrealistically stunning but is also an extremely bright and successful lawyer. She is just the woman we all aspire to be. But what meets the eye is in sheer contrast to the life she leads.
At home with her husband she is a subdued woman who does not dare speak – her life is run more in fear than in the worship she so obviously deserves.” – Chatty Diva

Making and sustaining positive and healthy female friendships in your 20’s, 30’s and beyond is getting harder and harder. Bonding and connecting has changed. Everyone is looking for something. Why is it so difficult to bond with other females? Are we playing The Game with each other? What exactly is The Game? And are we winning or losing?

“An important asset to have in any relationship, whether it is with your friend, boyfriend, lover, marriage partner, parents or siblings, is effective communication skills. I really feel that as a generation we lack respect for each other. I am not sure how you feel about this but it seems that when the tough get going, the going gets rough.

More and more people are checking out of their relationships because they aren’t able to communicate what they want or how they are feeling. They aren’t feeling as if the other person is listening to them and hearing what they have to say.”

“When it comes to relationships and dating, I have seen and heard it all. Desi men and desi women relate differently in the dating world and it is high time someone analyzed and read between the lines instead of taking everything at face value.
Desi men mainly use their left side of the brain, which is focused and to the point, which is why they are so direct. Here are some dating scenarios that could come across as confusing if you aren’t sure how to read correctly…”
Guest Blog: Sex and The Single Desi

GUEST BLOG: There are millions of women out there who find themselves drawn to the dysfunctional relational patterns of the past, unknowingly repeating the vicious cycle that drained their mothers, sisters, aunts, cousins of their emotional freedom. Feel empowered and know that you can break this unhealthy cycle and be a pioneer of change.

” I love being in my 30’s. There is just something about my 30’s that speaks to me. I feel that I am at a point in my life where the hormonal and petty stuff is behind me. Spiritually, everything is falling into place. I have all this knowledge about myself and the world that I can just apply it.” GUEST BLOG

GUEST BLOG: “In a world that expects everyone to desensitize and move on, I am here to tell you that it is okay to take time out from your daily routine, grieve and process your emotions.
Without processing and having a pity party, you are letting the pain affect your heart and every cell in your body.”

According to a Pew Research Center &Time Magazine survey, only half of Americans are getting married, which is down from 72 percent in 1960. And 40 percent of US adults think marriage is obsolete.
While there are no statistics on desi co-habitation, anecdotal evidence suggests that this is happening. A big surprise since Indians – and Indian-Americans – are generally marriage-obsessed.