What I learned as a Single Desi Born in the USA



An Indian born in America

An enigma- caught Between Two Worlds
Photo Credit: Varun Suresh


Single Desi – Caught Between Two Worlds

“Champions Keep Playing Until they get it Right”- Billie Jean King


Being first generation isn’t easy for anyone.  However, once you finish the first 30 years, you begin to understand life a little bit more.  Being in my mid-thirties, I am able to pass on some wisdom that might help other first generation desis on their life journey.

22 Tips to a More Productive Lifestyle

1. Health is EVERYTHING.  If you don’t have health, life can be a struggle.

2. Concentrate on being an individual, not collectively a South Asian group.  You will find a partner if someone likes WHO you are.   Focusing on being like everyone else is pointless because as people age, life diversifies and everyone goes in different directions.  Also, why would you want to be like everyone else, when God entrusted you with your own special gifts and talents?

3.  It doesn’t matter what anyone thinks of you.  People aren’t God, so they have no right to judge you.  Chances are if people are judging you, it is because they are uncomfortable with who they are.

4.  Just relax and enjoy the journey a little bit more.

5. Get creative:  Creativity is the key to leading a fulfilling life.  Develop lots of interests and enjoy

6. One of things I enjoyed most about my life is I got to do things that I enjoyed doing.  Do the things that you love to do.

7. Traveling is awesome.

8. Don’t let limited people intimidate you.

9. Don’t let anyone hurt you.  At the end of the day, you have to move on and be the best you that you can be.

10. If you spend countless hours trying to meet the wrong person, you won’t be fresh when the right person comes along.  Focus on being happy and taking care of yourself and everything else falls into place.

11.  Everyone needs something  (or someone) to make them feel validated and worthwhile.

12. There are so many different Indians out there.  You don’t have to be the same as everyone else.

13. Keep moving, even when it seems pointless.

14. Organic Coconut Oil is good for your hair and skin.

15. Every first generation Indian has a different life plan.

16. Life is nothing but a series of cycles.

17. Everyone needs updating at least once in their life (Zerona, invisilign, Zeltiq etc, etc…)

18. Drink lots of water.  It washes out the toxins and cleans your digestive system.

19. God really does have a plan.

20. Don’t let anyone stop you from achieving your best.

21. This too shall pass.

22. Don’t lose interest in yourself at ANY point in your life.



Monica Marwah

Monica Marwah writes about single desi relationships in 'Sex and the Single Desi' on Lassi with Lavina

Monica Marwah

Monica Marwah is a 30-something single school psychologist who enjoys living life to the fullest.  She is taking her experience and showing others how to believe in themselves and love themselves completely.  After years of dating and meeting people, she has come into her own.  Spirituality has been a foundation for self improvement for her and she is hoping to encourage people to embark upon a spiritual journey at this age.)

Enjoyed the post? Sign up for updates via email  and also visit Lassi with Lavina on Facebook! 




Related Posts:

Straight Talk from the Single Desi

Desi Dilemma- Pros and cons of the Single Life
The Single Desi Conquering the Inner Bully
Single Desi – Mid 30′s – What Now





About Author

is a single desi who writes about the experience in her blog posts. You can connect on Twitter at lollipop77 or on LinkedIn and Facebook with Monica Marwah.

1 Comment

  1. That was beautiful advice Monica. Thank you for encouraging us to be our true beautiful selves rather than conform to some one cookie-cutter Indian American mold!