Author: Monica Marwah

“When I was growing up, there was no Internet. We didn’t have access to people’s personal lives the way we do now. Things were happening back then but no one except immediate family and friends knew about it until some reporter got wind of it.

Now there are countless blogs, online magazines, social media, socialites and reality stars floating around. News flies around the world with the click of a button within two seconds. It is in your face and you can’t just ignore it.

However, I feel that there is a reason everyone is obsessed with celebrity culture and personal lives of celebrities: we are trying to find someone to relate to. Someone to look up to; Someone who is having experiences that parallel our experiences; Someone who can let us know that there is nothing wrong with us when bad things happen to us.” Guest Blog – Sex & the Single Desi
Photo: Christina Aguilera by Balt-art.

“Over the years, I have learned to be more protective and loving towards myself, therefore making excuses for other people’s blatant disrespect is something I am not willing to spend my life doing.

Sometimes, when you are around someone who is being uncharacteristically rude or nasty and walking away is leaving you with unanswered questions, then posing the question “Why are you so mean?” can help get a person to understand that it isn’t acceptable to behave this way around people, regardless of whether he likes you or not.”

Guest Blog – Sex and the Single Desi

“When our parents got married and migrated to America, marriage was a necessity – now it is choice – a choice to live happily – or unhappily – in holy matrimony.
My parents migrated to America so that I would have a better chance at life – to make my own choices and to discover a life and personality that is my own.
I mean, personally, why would I want to go back to tradition, when I am so used to living on my own terms? For me, I have just seen too much to go back and live a life where I haven’t seen enough.”
Guest Blog (Photo: Eole)

“These days, more and more woman are spending more time bonding with themselves than with anyone else. Everyone is moving at a fast pace and no one knows where they are going or how they will end up.

You have to stroke your own ego and you have to take care of yourself. No one is going to work hard for you, no one is going to pay your bills and no one can completely love you the way you love yourself.” GUEST BLOG

“Salman was my first boyfriend. I had a huge crush on him as a teenager. The crush led me to leave Florida and move to India and join films just so I could find him and get married to him. You have a license for doing idiotic things when you’re 15. However, I do not have a single regret of pursuing my first love.”

Somy Ali chats about Salman Khan, the Single Life, and her non-profit No More Tears on ‘Sex and the Single Desi’

Being single, sexy and fabulous is a choice that only the strongest and most confident desi women make. Amin Dhillon, Miss India Canada, was named amongst the Top 10 Indian Models along with Padma Lakshmi and Deepika Padukone. Here she talks about dating, romance and being single on Sex and the Single Desi blog.

Making and sustaining positive and healthy female friendships in your 20’s, 30’s and beyond is getting harder and harder. Bonding and connecting has changed. Everyone is looking for something. Why is it so difficult to bond with other females? Are we playing The Game with each other? What exactly is The Game? And are we winning or losing?

“I am dedicating this blog to the lovely Marilyn Monroe. Her birthday was on June 1st 1926. She would have been 85 years old. Marilyn Monroe was a beauty and cultural icon. Her amazing beauty and tumultuous life has left people fascinated and in awe of her.
Marilyn was born into a traumatic situation that haunted her at every stage of her life. She was misunderstood and exploited as an adult. However she kept going and fighting her battles independently. Today, she represents single women everywhere because of her constant search for true love and the perfect career.
All she ever wanted was everything. Isn’t that what we all want?” – Sex and the Single Desi

“An important asset to have in any relationship, whether it is with your friend, boyfriend, lover, marriage partner, parents or siblings, is effective communication skills. I really feel that as a generation we lack respect for each other. I am not sure how you feel about this but it seems that when the tough get going, the going gets rough.

More and more people are checking out of their relationships because they aren’t able to communicate what they want or how they are feeling. They aren’t feeling as if the other person is listening to them and hearing what they have to say.”

“A sexy desi women knows her mind, says what she feels and is not afraid to stand up for what she believes in. Being single and fabulous can be exciting and enjoyable as long as you make the best of every moment given to you. No apologies; no regrets…just you, facing off against the world.

Sure, life doesn’t go as planned, but at least you tried and you did what you wanted to do. We have no control over who we meet or who drags us to a dark place but we will always survive because we are survivors. We are our biggest supporters and our worst enemies tied up in one pretty package.”

“When it comes to relationships and dating, I have seen and heard it all. Desi men and desi women relate differently in the dating world and it is high time someone analyzed and read between the lines instead of taking everything at face value.
Desi men mainly use their left side of the brain, which is focused and to the point, which is why they are so direct. Here are some dating scenarios that could come across as confusing if you aren’t sure how to read correctly…”
Guest Blog: Sex and The Single Desi

Why did I marry this person, when God knew that our marriage wouldn’t last more than two years?
Why did I hook up with this guy and get dumped afterward when God knew it would happen, what was the point?
Why did my best friend in the whole world steal my boyfriend, why did God introduce her to me and why did we click so well?
Why did my loser ex-husband take my children and money, when all I did was give him my love and support?
Why did I study so hard for a career that landed me unemployed and/or unhappy?
Guest Blog: Sex and the Single Desi

“As a single desi, one really great way to establish your independence and live vicariously is to pick some hot destinations and explore. Check out the bars and clubs, talk to locals, sight-see and get a sense of how everyone else lives in different parts of the world. As a school psychologist, I am lucky to have spring break, Christmas break and summer vacation. I use that time to travel and see the world. Here are tips on traveling on your own and making the best of your given circumstances.” GUEST BLOG

GUEST BLOG: There are millions of women out there who find themselves drawn to the dysfunctional relational patterns of the past, unknowingly repeating the vicious cycle that drained their mothers, sisters, aunts, cousins of their emotional freedom. Feel empowered and know that you can break this unhealthy cycle and be a pioneer of change.

When you are in your adolescence and twenties, you want to do what the norm is. If everyone around you wants to be more Indian, then so do you. If everyone wants to be more American, then so do you. It depends on where you are living, your social experiences and how much impact your family has in shaping your cultural life.

” I love being in my 30’s. There is just something about my 30’s that speaks to me. I feel that I am at a point in my life where the hormonal and petty stuff is behind me. Spiritually, everything is falling into place. I have all this knowledge about myself and the world that I can just apply it.” GUEST BLOG

In a society where social networking is as easy as a click of a button, we all want to move ourselves to a better version of ourselves. We are living in a time where everyone has something to say and teach us. With tools such as Twitter and Facebook, we often compare ourselves to others and wonder if we are enough. (Guest BLog)

If you are in your 30’s, single and loving it, then don’t change a thing, enjoy your freedom and keep moving. However, if you are fretting about your age and feeling the tick tock of the clock then maybe you should consider other options… Guest blog in ‘Sex & the Single Desi’ by Monica Marwah

GUEST BLOG: “In a world that expects everyone to desensitize and move on, I am here to tell you that it is okay to take time out from your daily routine, grieve and process your emotions.
Without processing and having a pity party, you are letting the pain affect your heart and every cell in your body.”

According to a Pew Research Center &Time Magazine survey, only half of Americans are getting married, which is down from 72 percent in 1960. And 40 percent of US adults think marriage is obsolete.
While there are no statistics on desi co-habitation, anecdotal evidence suggests that this is happening. A big surprise since Indians – and Indian-Americans – are generally marriage-obsessed.